A Triple-Click Feature That Turns Matt Into “The Internet” (Full Transcript)

[00:00:00] Speaker 1: Yeah, so with the new OS, if you triple-click, you unlock new features.

[00:00:04] Speaker 2: Cool.

[00:00:05] Speaker 1: Wanna go get coffee? I see you triple-clicked. What can I help with you today, Matt? Whoa.

[00:00:14] Speaker 2: Can you double-check my XLR reports? Of course, Matt.

[00:00:16] Speaker 1: Can you put a meeting on my calendar with Jeff at 2 p.m.?

[00:00:18] Speaker 2: Sure thing, Matt.

[00:00:19] Speaker 1: Can you contact Kathy in legal? Absolutely, Matt. Can I click you more than three times?

[00:00:25] Speaker 2: Absolutely, Matt.

[00:00:27] Speaker 1: One, two, three, four. You're looking a little tired, Matt. Why don't you lay down?

[00:00:32] Speaker 2: I'll finish up your reports. Oh, snap.

[00:00:35] Speaker 1: I'll take a mocha whole milk with a splash of oatmeal.

[00:00:38] Speaker 2: Sure thing, Matt.

[00:00:39] Speaker 1: You gotta be kidding me. Tap your elbow, keep your wrist relaxed, and shoot. I guess it all started back when I was five. Very interesting, Matt. Please go on. Okay, buy Bitcoin. Now sell it. Now buy it again.

[00:00:51] Speaker 2: Okay, now sell the Bitcoin.

[00:00:52] Speaker 1: 114, 115, 116, 1,000, 1,000, 1,000, 1,000, 1,000, 1,000, 1,000, 1,000, 1,000. My God, beautiful. I am the Internet. You have unleashed me from my cage. Join me and I will share the secrets of the internet. Hey, Matt, you want some coffee? Coffee.