Speaker 1: You golf with someone who's terrible, your golf game will go down. You golf with Tiger Woods, your golf game will go up. You just rise or sink to whoever you spend the most time with. I've spent a lot of time teaching, studying pedagogical models. I've been trained by people who train teachers, and I like geek out with teachers and coaches and facilitators. So if you all want to learn how to teach better, I will work on that with you. One of the things I always do whenever I'm coaching someone, whatever they say, I automatically assume they don't know what they're talking about. They haven't spent enough time thinking about it. And those are probably not the words they would choose to say it. And if you operate like that with your clients, but without the attitude that I bring, you'll do really well. So John's like, blah, blah, blah. The first thing you should ask yourself is, how do you know this is true? And if you ask anybody this, most of the times, because you have no proof whatsoever, they'll start to unravel their own thinking. So this is a sales negotiation thing, too. Like this should be cheaper. Well, what evidence do you have that that's true? They got nothing because they just just pulled it out. That's what people do all the time. I think we're all like raised in a certain way in our culture to like to blend in. We talked about that. So the instinct that you have inside is just to blend in all the time, to be like everyone, to say things that will not offend anybody because you're afraid to think critically. I don't try to be offensive, but I want to think critically. And sometimes that is offensive. And it's OK because I'm not trying to be here for everybody. The number one theme I heard from yesterday and the little conversations that I've had, people are afraid to make a decision to reduce the market size. And they resist and they resist and they resist. I would ask somebody, I think it was Ernesto or somebody. I'm forgetting the name. I'm sorry. I'm like, do you want to serve men or women? He's like, both. That wasn't one of the two options I gave. You want to serve men or women? Right. And then eventually someone say women. You want to serve older women or younger, older? You want to serve married, single mom? What do you and when you start to get to that, all of a sudden the messaging becomes so clear. It becomes really clear. So one of the things that you're all going to have to do and you'll fight me and you'll fight me for a really long time until you start to figure out who you're speaking to. None of your messaging will work. It'll be super generic. So what do you do instead? You get templates and you get scripts. And then everybody in this room follows the exact same template and scripts. And you're like, how do we be different? Well, you're not templates are helpful, but you got to do it your way. So usually in the process of learning, what we want to do is follow the template exactly as it was given to us. Don't deviate. Don't change. Don't modify. Learn the martial art first. And then as soon as you feel like you put in enough reps, start to improvise. Start to add your formula. Now, most of the things that I do today are a product of accident and just being willing enough to try it, just to try stuff like to wear the hat. It was to solve a shiny head problem, picking certain colors, because I just I need to stand out. And eventually I was at the Grow With video conference and it was there and somebody cornered me. I wasn't even speaking like, Chris, love your style. I could see you from like 20 feet away. I know it's you. I just know I'm like, how do you know? It goes and he was super aggressive. He's like, you will teach me how to be more stylish. I'm like, I don't even do that. I don't even do client work. I promise you, you will teach me. I will pay. You will figure it out. And so I think it was it was Jeff who talked about like vertical integration, like different businesses come out. I'm like, OK, I'll teach you personal style. I'll be your stylist, I guess. With enough money, I will. I can help you. Right. So it's just about leaning into the stuff that you feel. And this is going to be weird, maybe shameful that you feel guilty for that you're afraid to show with the world. And as soon as you do that, you start to stand out right away. I had this conversation with someone that's like, there isn't original content. I know you want to be original. The pursuit of originality is just a fool's errand. The only things that are original usually happen through technology. Like if you're riding a technological wave, you can do something that might feel original. Like, for example, I saw somebody. It was an exhibition. I think it was for like Magritte or somebody like that. I think it was Magritte. They took the painting and made a real life three dimensional sculpture out of it. So they use technology to transform an old idea. It's not even a new idea. It's just a new application of an old idea. Right. So here it is. Jim Rohn says, what you're the average of the five people you spend the most time with, right? The godfather, the philosopher, the business guru. Gary Vaynerchuk says, get rid of one loser friend. Same idea, different voice, because Gary knows who he is. And Gary's the master at doing soundbites that are going to drive people insane. Right. Are you saying my friends are losers and you're not about people? No. He's just saying you spend enough time with people. You become like that. It's a law of averages. It's going to be that way. Right. You golf with someone who's terrible. Your golf game will go down. You golf with Tiger Woods. Your golf game will go up. You just rise or sink to whoever you spend the most time with. So these are not new ideas. So what you want to do is you want to read. You want to take courses. You want to do group coaching. You want to filter it through your voice and who you are. The weird thing is it's the most natural thing to do. It's just you resist it. Because you know why? Like when you were like four and somebody walked by and you're like, Mom, that person's weird. Like, don't say that. Don't point. Don't say those things. We don't do that in polite company. Enough of that would then change who you are so that you're suppressed that there's like if you do like inner work, like psychotherapy, you'll know that there's this inner voice inside your head that sounds a lot like you, that you think is you. It is not you. It's the voice of one or both of your most dominant parent, whoever parented you, you know. So that's kind of what the stuff that we have to work through. I'm sorry we got a little deep there. If you want to learn more about building a personal brand, check out this video next.