Empowering Leadership: Teaching Others to Solve Their Own Problems (Full Transcript)

Speaker 1: The saying, give a man a fish and you feed him for a day, teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime, I truly believe relates to leadership. As a leader, do you ever find that an awful lot of your day is answering people's questions and solving people's problems, even though actually you have a suspicion they probably could do that themselves? And as leaders, we do have experience and we do have knowledge that is absolutely fine to share with others in the right situation, however, are we really helping people? So in fact, when we do give advice and share our experiences, are we in fact feeding them just for the day, so they will come back another day? What we want to do, of course, is to teach them to fish, but by just feeding them, we're also probably feeding something in ourselves. I know that I have a real need for recognition and also to be needed, and that helps me in an awful lot of aspects of my life, but in leadership and coaching, it can be a real hindrance. When somebody asks me for my advice, I absolutely love that. I'm helping them, aren't I? But in essence, I'm really just truly feeling a need in myself. So when I came across really what coaching was all about, which is giving somebody else the capacity to solve their own problems by getting them to explore their own situation, that really did enlighten me as to what we can do for other people. So rather than feeding me, it's all about that person. I came across a story a number of years ago which really helps me relate and think about what I'm doing to help other people, and that's the story of a man who came across a butterfly cocoon. The man came across this cocoon and saw the small hole and the butterfly struggling to get through this small hole, and he was absolutely fascinated with this butterfly's struggle. And as he watched it, he was curious as to how the butterfly was going to manage to get through this minute hole. He went away, and a few hours later he came back, and the butterfly was still trying to struggle through the hole. He watched, thinking what could he do to help? He felt for the butterfly and wanted to do something, but again he went away, hoping that when he returned, that the butterfly would have flown away. So when he did return, to his dismay, the butterfly was still trying to struggle through the hole and looked like it was almost giving up, and he could not hold himself back. So he wanted to help the butterfly so much, he took a pair of scissors and he cut through the cocoon. And out came the butterfly with ease, but to his absolute horror, instead of the butterfly that he expected, the butterfly had an engorged body and withered wings. Because the man in his haste to help did not realise that the struggle for the butterfly to get through the hole in the cocoon actually serves to force the fluid from its body into its wings, so it can be fully formed to fly as a butterfly should. So that story stays with me and helps remind me of when I'm leading and coaching as to what I can do in service for other people. So I challenge you as leaders, before you dive in and give advice, is to think about how much pleasure you get from solving problems, and instead give the greatest gift of giving that other person the pleasure of solving their own problem. By asking great questions, getting them to explore their situation, and more importantly it's about patience, waiting whilst in fact the person probably struggles to their own solution, because great leaders are surrounded by beautiful butterflies. www.mooji.org